Recently, I received a request for a proposal from a non-profit. Looking at the work they needed and the budget available, I knew I’d be contributing a fair amount of my time without being paid for it.
I considered it anyway. It was a chance to help an organisation do something worthwhile. I could treat some of the work as an in-kind contribution, complete another project, and potentially earn a testimonial.
But I decided not to submit.
The money was part of the calculation. The bigger issue was the time. I’m building Bunker41 alongside my engineering job and family responsibilities, and I’ve set hard boundaries around how much of my life the business gets.
This project didn’t fit within them.
That’s an uncomfortable decision when you’re still figuring out how to bring in clients. I want the work. I want to build a reputation. Turning down an opportunity can seem at odds with both of those things.
But I also have to look at what I’m agreeing to deliver. If the budget doesn’t cover the work, and I’m willing to make up the difference myself, those hours still have to come from somewhere. Calling them a contribution doesn’t make them any easier to find.
In my forties, I’m more aware of that than ever. Time has become my most expensive currency. I can be flexible about what I charge when there’s a good reason. I have much less flexibility about how much time I can give.
A testimonial would have been useful. It wouldn’t have given me those hours back.
I need to choose what I can reasonably contribute. For this project, I couldn’t justify the commitment alongside everything else I’m responsible for.
The question that helped was simple: where would the time actually come from?
After more than twenty years in software, I’m comfortable assessing whether I can do the work. Deciding whether I should take it on requires a different kind of honesty. I have to account for the life around the project, too.
If you’re building something alongside a job or family, that’s a useful question to sit with before you agree to more work. Look at your actual calendar. What would have to move? What would you have to give up? “I’ll squeeze it in” needs a better answer than “somewhere.”
My boundaries don’t mean much if I keep making exceptions whenever work becomes available. I’d already decided what I was willing to give the business. This was a chance to follow through on that decision.
In the end, I recommended a friend’s company. The project might fit their circumstances better than mine. I don’t know whether it’ll turn into work for them, but the organisation has another option to explore, and I could pay it forward without taking on the project myself.
I’m learning that running a business includes deciding which opportunities to leave alone. I still need to find clients, and declining this one doesn’t guarantee a better project will arrive. It does leave me with the time I chose to protect.
Sometimes you just gotta say no thanks.